Lifestyle self-growth

10 Things You Need to Stop Wasting Time On

things to stop wasting your time on

Your time, my friend, is one of your most valuable personal assets, do you keep track of where it goes?

Some of these things that you need to stop wasting time on just… happen. We do those things mindlessly, not giving them a lot of thought.

What would it feel like to have more freedom, more time to do things you truly enjoy?

10 THINGS YOU NEED TO STOP WASTING TIME ON

10 Things You Need to Stop Wasting Time on

REGRET

Regret for wasted time is more wasted time” ~ Mason Cooley
Regret will not change anything. It won’t make your current circumstance or situation any better or different, regret will not change your past.

It’s simple as that.

For the most part, regret keeps you stuck and if you spend too much of your time living in regret, you will find it impossible to move forward. It’s this moment, right here, that you have to make worth living. Do you want to spend your energy thinking of what could have been, or would it be better if you took that energy to work and create something that can be?

BEATING YOURSELF UP

Stop wasting time by bashing your body, by telling yourself you’re not good enough, stop telling yourself you’re stupid for going one direction instead of the other. Don’t allow yourself to become your worst enemy, try being more kind to yourself. Instead of beating yourself up over your mistakes, use each of them as teaching tools (something we just talked about in this post).

DRAMA

As much as you sometimes try to avoid it… drama might somehow find its way in. Getting involved in someone else’s pointless drama is a huge waste of time. We sometimes just loooove wasting our energy gossiping, telling stories, sometimes the whole “drama” thing happens at work and NOT being a part of it, isn’t always easy when you have 3 different people trying to tell you their part of the story.

Well, just because it’s difficult, doesn’t mean it’s impossible. Things like these don’t bother you until you actually realize how stupid and pointless they are, AND just how much energy they take away from you.

HOLDING GRUDGES

Don’t waste your time on resentment- learn to let go and forgive. Whether it’s you forgiving yourself, or forgiving others, letting go is sometimes one of the hardest things we need to learn. Once you do let go, you will see the emotional freedom and clarity that come with it. You will see that holding to a grudge, is holding yourself back.

things to stop wasting your time on, stop wasting time

POINTLESS BUSYNESS

Sometimes we get so busy, we feel overwhelmed and try to do way too much all at once, while ending up getting… nothing done.

That, is pointless busyness.

It’s like being “busy” for no reason. There is a major difference between being “productive” and being “busy.” Just because you find yourself being busy, it doesn’t mean that you’re getting a ton of things done. Focus on single-tasking, try time-blocking and swap being busy for being productive.

PUSHING AWAY YOUR FEELINGS

Do not be afraid to let yourself feel. Negative feelings have their purpose, too. The more you try to resent those feelings, the harder they can hit you. Their purpose is to help you survive, so if you feel upset, or frustrated, let yourself feel those emotions. Don’t waste your time on pushing them away because sooner or later, they will find their way out. Recognize those negative feelings and emotions for what they are; let yourself feel them and let them go without judgment.

TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS

Not all of those are easy to let go of, but ending toxic relationships can transform your life. Gossip, complaining, nagging, these things bring exactly ZERO value to your life. Every once in a while, take some time to re-evaluate your relationships.

CONSTANT COMPARISON

Looking at others, thinking: “I wish I was doing that, too.” Don’t we all sometimes have those “the grass is greener on the other side” feelings?  Constant comparison, especially the 21st century kind of comparison when most people put their lives online for everyone else to see, is flat-out unfair. On the one hand we judge, sometimes thinking that perhaps, in some way, we’re “better” than others, and on the other hand, we feel jealous when looking at someone else’s success or life.

Neither of those is a positive feeling. Jealousy and judgment do not serve you. Quit being unfair to both yourself and other people and learn to appreciate where you are; see all the good, the magic that your own life has. Don’t waste your time on worrying about what everyone else is doing.

WAITING

“Things will be better when…”

“I will be happy when…”

…well you fill in that blank.

As someone who spent a great deal of time waiting for that perfect moment, on numerous occasions, I can tell you this: perfect moments never come. You can spend the rest of your life waiting. If there is something you want to do or accomplish, start now. No matter how small that first step might be, take it. Today, or even now. Do not spend the rest of your life waiting.

SAYING “YES” WHEN YOU REALLY WANT TO SAY… “NO”

Setting up healthy boundaries is key to your happiness. If you find saying “no” difficult, remember that by saying “no” to one thing, you can later end up saying “yes” to something better. Maybe you’re a bit of a people pleaser, maybe you’re afraid of hurting your relationship so you say “yes” to spending the night out with a friend when all you want to do is stay home and eat pizza. Your time and energy are among the most valuable resources, you shouldn’t invest them in things that aren’t important to YOU, or on things you don’t feel like doing. This is true when it comes to relationships as well as your work.

Here’s one of the most important lessons I’ve learned this year, which I’ve always known to be a huge waste of time, but was guilty of: allowing others to define things like happiness or success to me.  These two things mean different things to us all. You have to live your life on your own terms, without allowing anyone else to dictate what you should or shouldn’t be doing.

Some people, usually those who are close to us, have their own idea of what they think our lives should look like, or which path we should be taking. We have to learn to live our lives, unapologetically, not worrying about or wasting time on thinking if it meets with someone else’s approval.

Usually, it’s not until something painful or difficult happens to us, that we realize just how much time we waste.

We pick stupid little fights with our loved ones, we refuse to forgive, we don’t want to move on, we wait for things to simply “fall into place” rather than trying to make a change. It’s not until we experience loss, or go through a major change or a health problem when we think “Wow, I’ve wasted so much time on stupid things that don’t really matter.” Stop wasting time and start living your life on your own terms. 

33 Comments

  • Reply
    Christine .
    December 15, 2017 at 10:12 am

    SO much yes to this post. I’m horrible about dealing with toxic relationships and learning when I need to say no. It’s something I’ve worked on so hard this year. It’s not always easy, but I’m getting there.

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      December 20, 2017 at 5:10 pm

      I agree that it’s not easy- sometimes it’s even impossible, but ending those toxic relationships makes such an incredible difference. We often don’t notice just how toxic some people are, until we actually cut them off. x

  • Reply
    Luxestyle
    December 15, 2017 at 11:46 am

    You make such great points – I spend way too much time doing some of these too! x

  • Reply
    Dany Queen
    December 15, 2017 at 12:39 pm

    I spent too much time this year waiting, and that’s something. think I’m going to work really hard to fix in the next year! Great post! xx

    Dany | Danielle Reine

  • Reply
    Abigail Alice
    December 15, 2017 at 4:32 pm

    Once I removed myself from a drama fuelled crowd in high school I never looked back! I cannot stand drama and just think it’s a pointless stress!

    Abigail Alice x

  • Reply
    Very Much Mia
    December 15, 2017 at 8:57 pm

    This was such a fantastic post and I relate to it on so many levels! I used to wait for the weekend, or the next month, or the next year…or wait until I accomplished X or got Y…thinking that all of this waiting would lead me to happiness. SO far from the truth! I have learned how to live in the moment and it has been life-changing. I definitely need to work on not holding grudged. My lack of forgiveness sometimes is a weakness of mine for sure.

    Mia | http://www.verymuchmia.com

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      December 22, 2017 at 9:41 am

      Living in the moment really is life-changing, although it’s hard to practice it at first, it’s worth every effort. I think that learning forgiveness is a very long process, it takes time, I’m sure you’ll get there one day! :)

  • Reply
    Linda Libra Loca
    December 16, 2017 at 8:22 am

    Being busy versus being productive resonates so much with me. People complain about being busy all the time, but never get anything done, because they don’t focus and prioritize. Not that this never happens to me, but I really try to be productive instead of busy.

    Anne – Linda, Libra, Loca

  • Reply
    Natalie Redman
    December 16, 2017 at 10:25 am

    Great post! Love this.

    http://www.upyourvlog.com

  • Reply
    lilian Tahmasian
    December 16, 2017 at 12:42 pm

    So inspiring & informative! : )
    Thank You!

    http://www.liliantahmasian.com

  • Reply
    Jay S
    December 16, 2017 at 1:59 pm

    Dang, thats some good advice id say. I really agree with your point on pushing your feelings away. I feel like I always have so many negative feelings that I just push to the side and with that, they all get built up and that result is even worse. I appreciate all your wise words!

    Jay
    jayolivia.blogspot.ca

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      December 22, 2017 at 9:46 am

      Thank you, Jay! Those negative feelings do have a tendency to build up over time and pushing them away can backfire, big time.

  • Reply
    Naya // partyparrotblog.com
    December 17, 2017 at 7:22 am

    You truly speak my mind. I love every single point mentioned here, especially “pointless busyness”. I often see people who talk about having no time, when in reality they’re not really busy doing anything productive. I have to admit – I tend to procrastinate too, but just like you said – time-blocking is key. Thanks for the inspo and advice dear xx

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      December 22, 2017 at 9:43 am

      Aww thanks Naya! Yess I see that all the time- and I used to do the same hehe. Time-blocking is the only way I can get things done, I get distracted way too easily!

  • Reply
    Danielle Alexa
    December 17, 2017 at 8:47 am

    This is such a great post. Life is far too short for wasting time on things that don’t matter such as holding a grudge!

    Danielle xx
    http://www.fashionbeautyblog.co.uk/

  • Reply
    Hannah
    December 17, 2017 at 12:00 pm

    This. Everything. Just yes. This was a great reminder actually, thank you!

    Hannah | Wild At Heart

  • Reply
    KELLiLASH/Kelly
    December 18, 2017 at 9:52 am

    Yes, yes, yes to all!! I love posts like yours that are a gentle reminder every now and again! 💜

    – Kelly xx
    http://www.KELLiLASH.com

  • Reply
    Coco
    December 18, 2017 at 5:39 pm

    I definetly need to have more of these mindsets! Will be working on that… when I fill in that blank!
    Coco| pjsandstuff.wordpress.com

  • Reply
    The Sunday Mode
    December 19, 2017 at 4:34 am

    Jeez I really needed to read this, especially the part about comparison because I’ve been bloody awful with that lately! A lot of amazing things are happening in my friend’s lives and we’re in the same career field so I can’t help but wonder why those things aren’t happening to me etc etc and it’s been making me feel really down about my own life.

    Julia // The Sunday Mode

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      December 22, 2017 at 9:45 am

      Aww I know how that feels, Julia! When this happens, I like to use those events as reminders that I’m on a similar frequency and that great things happening in other people’s lives means that they can also happen to me.

  • Reply
    Alexis
    December 19, 2017 at 10:38 pm

    Such good advice! Thank you for sharing <3

    I'm kind of obsessed with your bedside table/lamp! Interior decoration goals!!

    A xx
    alexisadrienne.net

  • Reply
    Liana Pouget
    January 1, 2018 at 12:59 pm

    Hi Paula! I loved your post! Sometimes, people ask to use to do things because they find it normal but we don’t think in the same way, we don’t have the same values. I believe that we just have to let them understand that we don’t want to do it, and if they still don’t understand, we can just let go, because we can’t control it. Of course it’s difficult, but we don’t have to waste ours time for things that will not matter in 5 years, that will not make use happy.
    all my love,
    Lou-Anne

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