Girl talk Lifestyle self-growth

How to rock your goals in 2019

How to Rock Your Goals in 2019

How to Rock Your Goals in 2019

I can’t stand the word “resolutions.”

When I hear “resolutions,” I think immediate failure and discouragement. I think of that one year when I promised myself I’d learn to play guitar, go for a run every single day for the entire year, or stay away from red wine for at least six months.

Yeah, that last one was never going to happen.

So yes, there is something (…rather obvious) about the New Year and it being all about a “fresh start” and all that, but shouldn’t we strive to set yourself new and exciting goals (not resolutions), all year round?

When I was much younger, I thought that I will reach a point in my life (somewhere in my early twenties, preferably) where I’d have it all figured out. A point, where everything just falls into place, where there aren’t any struggles, doubts, and disappointments, failures or setbacks. Where there aren’t any more goals I’d want to set for myself.

Well, as it turns out, you grow up and find out that that’s just not true. It’s not how any of it works in life. Every year brings changes, challenges, and both create opportunities for more growth.

HOW TO ROCK YOUR GOALS IN 2019

How to Rock Your Goals in 2019 #goals #selfgrowth #productivity

HERE’S TO FORGIVENESS

For many of us, the unwillingness to forgive and move on is that one thing that holds us back. We “live in the past” and refuse to move on. We hold on to grudges and throw around blame, failing to take responsibility for our own lives. We blame our parents for their lack of love growing up, for being too hard on us, for helping too much or not helping at all, for working too much or for not caring enough. Well, the truth is, we’re all a little “messed up” in one way or another. IF things were to always be picture-perfect, if everything you wished for and wanted was handed to you without any effort- what would your life be all about, really? What would you strive for?

We should not let our past stop us from creating the future we dream of.

Sometimes, it’s not others we are so unwilling to forgive, but ourselves. There are times when we screw things up. Times when we get ourselves in certain situations and hate ourselves for it. There are many things you might find yourself feeling guilty about- not spending enough time with your kids, working too much, not working enough, missing your daily workout, not being able to finish your “to do” list- some of these things might seem small, but it’s important to forgive yourself for those, too.

Yesterday is gone. Your future starts now. Some things can be hard to let go of, but there comes a point when you have to ask yourself: “am I going to let this hold me back?”

WHAT IS IT THAT’S HOLDING YOU BACK?

Is it fear failure? Fear of being judged? As we just discussed in this post, success, and failure often go hand in hand. Anyone who’s ever succeeded at anything (both in professional and personal growth areas) has failed at some point. Some failures are bigger than others. I could sit here and tell you about all of these successful people who got what they wanted after being told “NO” hundreds of times, without letting it stop them.

Instead, I’ll tell you this: you will fail.

At some point, you will fail.

So there, since you already know that you probably will fail, what’s there left to be afraid of? You fail, you get up and you try again. It doesn’t matter if your failure is as small as skipping a workout or as big as a huge project suddenly falling apart. As long as you keep trying and don’t walk away from that goal, and as long as you show up and you don’t give up, you will never be a failure.


STOP WITH THE EXCUSES

The only way your past or present circumstances can equal your future is if you allow them. You may not have “something” (like resources, support, money) but you can’t let that be the defining factor. We love feeling sorry for ourselves and playing the victim. A lot of our beliefs about ourselves are shaped by the people around us. Everything you believe yourself to be is a combination of what you’ve been through, things your parents or caretakers taught you, the way your teachers spoke to you. The way you saw and experienced things around you. The way other people treated you.

It doesn’t matter where you come from or what your current situation is, or where you’re planning on getting or how unfair you think your life has been. Don’t let where you are today stop you from going where you want to be.  Put your excuses aside, let go of limiting thoughts and go after what you want, even if you have to take very small steps. Sometimes that’s exactly how your “success” is built: by those daily habits, those small things you do (or don’t do) every single day. Not all change needs to be big or intimidating- small changes can make a big difference, too. If you find your goals to be too intimidating or overwhelming try focusing on just the next 24 hours. What can you do in these next 24 hours to bring yourself closer to that goal?

AND THE LAST THING YOU NEED IS…

Discipline.

Being disciplined is hard.

It’s all about making a change in your day-to-day behavior and habits. It’s consistency and willingness to change your old habits and develop new ones. It’s also one of those things that you just can’t reach your goals without.

How to Rock Your Goals in 2019 #goals #selfgrowth #productivity

Having a goal-centered routine makes it easier to stay disciplined and it also makes it a bit more painless. It all comes down to your habits. There will be days when your motivation and inspiration will start to die down, and you will feel like quitting. It’s much easier to say “oh, I’ll just take a little break today and try again tomorrow or I’m too tired than it is to keep going. Being disciplined means that sometimes you need to delay your gratification. It means allowing yourself to be uncomfortable at times.

Occasionally, it means missing out on things. Sure, at first, working through and establishing a new routine seems both difficult and complicated. Once you make it through the first 30 days or so, things get easier. If you haven’t read it yet, check out The Power of Habit– sometimes understanding how things work (including our thinking process, habit forming and science behind why we do what we do every day) can be very helpful in overcoming those small obstacles.

Creating a clear vision for your goals is an aspirational component, it’s something that will keep you going. When you stop using excuses, you realize your potential. You won’t let your present or past circumstances dictate your future. Discipline, however, is what will help you stick with those changes you make in your behavior and daily habits and keep track of your progress. If you’re only “kinda interested in your goals” then set them and talk about them a little. Do that and you will end up doing what pretty much most of us are doing: wishing and not taking action, watching the time pass by. If you actually commit and teach yourself that discipline, you will find that will and drive to do everything you need, in order to reach your goals.


One more thing to remember: you can’t get discouraged easily. Whatever your goal(s) is(are), you will experience some setbacks, at one point or another. It’s never too late to go after your dreams and set new goals for yourself. The thing is, you have to put some work in- wishful thinking alone just won’t do the job. Don’t just talk about it- work for it. 

21 Comments

  • Reply
    Lisa Autumn
    December 27, 2018 at 1:35 pm

    YESYESYES! I really needed this post… so motivating!

    x Lisa | lisaautumn.com

  • Reply
    Teya | Tlmblog
    December 27, 2018 at 7:19 pm

    Awesome post! I thought the same way when I was younger! Just waiting for everything to be figured out and the only thing that I’ve figured out is that nothing is given and it’s hard work all the way

  • Reply
    Linda Libra Loca
    December 28, 2018 at 3:10 am

    I thought I´d have it all figured out in my early 20s to. Then I thought I´d have that in my early 30s. And now I am about to enter my 40s and doubt I will have it figured out by then…

    Anne|Linda, Libra, Loca

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      January 3, 2019 at 1:20 am

      I think this is one of the most important lessons I’ve learned- that in life you simply never stop learning and that while you might never be able to have it all figured out, it doesn’t mean that your life will be any less amazing or fulfilling.

  • Reply
    Bry Jaimea
    December 28, 2018 at 5:04 am

    I’m in my mid-30s and I still don’t have it all figured out! However, whereas in my 20’s I was sure figuring it out was possible, now I know that we’re all wandering through the dark together, no matter how old we are.
    Great post my dear xx

    xx Bry Jaimea | bryjaimea.com

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      January 3, 2019 at 1:27 am

      Yes, I love that, Bry! There comes a time in life when you realize that maybe having it all “figured out” is not what life is all about. :)

  • Reply
    Alice May
    December 28, 2018 at 6:00 am

    I’m hoping 2019 will be the year I achieve all my goals! I’ll be using these tips

    Alice XO | thealicemayedit.co.uk

  • Reply
    chloelxuise
    December 28, 2018 at 7:19 am

    Great tips! I don’t tend to stick to new years resolutions but im promising myself that I will this year!

  • Reply
    Julia Speaks
    December 28, 2018 at 3:27 pm

    Discipline is definitely hard, but so so important to accomplish anything. This year I have grown a lot in that sense, I am quite disciplined when I’ve got a goal to reach and although I don’t put stressful pressure on myself to achieve them, I always make sure I am disciplined and get things done. This post is spot on Paula, well done and I hope you reach all your goals in 2019 – and more!

    Julia x
    Last Post: Tips for a Cosy Home Day | https://juliaspeaksbeauty.blogspot.com/2018/12/lifestyle-perfect-cosy-home-day.html

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      January 3, 2019 at 1:27 am

      Thank you so much, Julia! Not putting too much stress on yourself is so important, happy to hear that you’re a pro at getting things done. Happy 2019!

  • Reply
    Danielle Alexa
    December 29, 2018 at 7:49 am

    I absolutely adored reading this blog post, I am all for goals, not resolutions!

    Danielle xx
    https://www.fashionbeautyblog.co.uk

  • Reply
    Speakingofchloe
    December 29, 2018 at 10:19 pm

    It’s truly scary what the fear of failure can do to keep you from your goals. Sometimes I think we need to hear “you will fail” a little more often so we aren’t so scared of it! I know that for 2019 I really want to push myself to stop being so afraid to fail at the things I really want.

    I hope you have a great new year in 2019! You’re so inspiring as a blogger and writer! 🙌🏻

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      January 3, 2019 at 1:27 am

      Failure has such a bad rep, but in reality it’s impossible to succeed at anything, without failing at some point.

      Thank you so much for your kind words, Love. Wishing you all the best in 2019 and sending my love your way!

  • Reply
    Caroline
    December 30, 2018 at 4:44 am

    Yes, yes, yes, this all this!
    I especially love the part on discipline. This is definitely something I plan to master in 2019 to help me get on track and reach goals. :)

    Caroline.x
    http://www.carolineelgeywhite.com

    • Reply
      Paula @ thirteenthoughts.com
      January 3, 2019 at 1:27 am

      Thank you, Caroline! Discipline is key to reaching your goals- hope 2019 is amazing to you and that you’ll be able to reach every single goal you’ve set for yourself this year. x

Leave a Reply